Process of Elimination is the First Step to Our Identity


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I don’t know who I am…But I know who i am not

There have been many times in my life when I think back I can’t remember exactly when I started my journey of self-awareness but I can say that there were a few defining moments that really had me asking the hard questions or where I felt completely stuck and not knowing exactly what to do next. I have spent time beating myself up over the mistakes and choices I made and not really sure what comes next or which way I should go from here or simply not knowing what to do or not do or whether I was making the right choices as a woman, mother or entrepreneur.

Then during the end of the summer, I fell upon to Matthew McConaughey motivation video and one point really stuck with me:

So the best way to truly know who you are is by finding first who you are not first!

  • Have you ever been conscious about what you are investing your time and energy in?
  • Do you ever find yourself reflecting on what sets your soul on fire? What’s really your purpose in life?
  • How do you define your boundaries according to your personality?
  • Do you know who you truly are? And I’m talking about the real you with all your fears, imperfections, and flaws.

So What Exactly is Self-Awareness and Why is it Important?

In simple term, self-awareness is an awareness of who you are and what makes you I unique in thoughts, experiences, and your abilities. So basically, it involves us paying more attention to our inner thoughts, emotions, and beliefs and realize how they affect or influence our lives, emotions, and our everyday choices. Being self-aware is about always trying to understand different perspectives and to learn from our mistakes and choices.

So How do we begin our journey to become more self-aware?

The first thing we must realize that It takes time and work to learn how to tune out our thoughts and our emotions, becoming more self-aware of who we are not is something that can happen overnight It’s actually a constant journey and process that is always continuing and evolving as you get older and as your situation changes.

For me personally I realized that I needed to pay more attention to my every thought, action, behavior, and emotion, I noticed for example that every time someone asked me how I was doing I would usually respond with negative comment or I kept comparing myself to other entrepreneurs, etc…. And I do have to admit it’s not an easy process to change something we do unconsciously, It’s actually a daily struggle to consciously work on our inner thoughts, emotions, and behavior!

How starting the Process of Elimination is the key towards knowing what you exactly want?

Living in a world where we have a lot of options and unlimited possibilities and choices, it becomes difficult to come to a conclusion or decide who we truly are. This situation makes you fall into the trap of uncertainty. Elimination is a necessary process that will help you narrow down and bring you closer to a version of yourself that’s truly authentic.

Greek philosopher Aristotle, who lived between 384–322 BC, once said: Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom.”

I truly love this quote because it’s true knowing yourself is absolutely the truest form of wisdom we can ever achieve! And trust me I know there is a lot of noise around from different people’s opinions, which makes it hard to find oneself and we usually ended up being or living a life copied for someone else!

But by starting the process of eliminating the unnecessary options, opinions, and distractions, there is nothing left but finding the real you!

You will no longer find yourself being in doubt about the choices you make

I truly believe It takes a lot of courage and will power to peel off the layers bit by bit and as we do, we usually lose people who we thought our friends, or finding ourselves changing elements of our daily lives that have been a part of us for such a long time!

Just remember what’s not essential to your well-being. As you eliminate activities that don’t interest you and narrow down your list of passions, you’ll inch up even closer towards finding your life’s purpose.

I think Benjamin Franklin Said it better: There are three things extremely hard: steel, a diamond, and to know one’s self.

Let’s Start Saying “ No” to things We don’t want!

Focused moments of inner reflection and discipline helped me become more mindful in the way I interacted with others and with myself. What was hard was that as I developed my self-awareness, I began to see how much I said yes or tolerated things that were either making me unhappy or simply added no value to my life. And when we really start saying ” No” to the things or people we actually start are saying “Yes” to ourselves!

I noticed the positive effects which it brings into your life is quite magical and unburdening! It also provides you with a positive and healthy mindset,

As Mathew said: “An honest man’s pillow is his peace of mind, and when you lay down on the pillow at night, no matter who’s in our bed we ALL sleep alone.”

It’s Up To You

It’s up to you and only you alone can make the decision to start this journey and once you start walking on the path of self-awareness and discovery, you truly start living your truth and embracing who you are and never be sorry for that, you won’t let anything or anyone keep you away from knowing who you truly are. If there is anything or anyone that comes in your way of knowing your true self, it is not meant for you. Learn to let things or people go, it might be hard at first, but I truly believe that anything that disrupts your happiness and no longer serves, shouldn’t be a part of your life.

“Knowing others is intelligence; knowing yourself is true wisdom. Mastering others is strength; mastering yourself is true power.”

Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching

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